Therapy?

Mama always told me I was impatient.

Blame the stars. In my 24 year history I’ve started many, many projects with much gusto and vigour, only to get bored quickly and fizzle out eventually. A few examples currently. Learning Japanese, redocorating my room, categorising my music collection, compiling a photo album, arranging my DVDs, researching a complete workout regime. They are all still pretty much left hanging.

But Mama also told me I had resilience.

…if only I use it more. If only I don’t take it too easy most of the time. She would likely use a few examples of the things that have gone really right in my life to either motivate me, or to irritate me especially when near exams. My SPM, 8th grade piano, the choir, debate team, calligraphy, writing… I have built up quite a repertoire of past achievements. And if success is measured by the friends I have, I’m already there.

But Mama ain’t here no more, so I gotta think up ways to pick myself up. The past 4 months have been tiring, hard work but sensing a desire for change, I got up and set about correcting the things that are still left hanging. I won’t lie to you, I am very proud of how I’ve come through these months.

Lost 36 pounds, exercising regularly, eating more healthy (fruits and veggies everyday), changed the way I treat people, learnt not to take things too personally… a self-image overhaul. People around me notice the change, and I do feel elated, but I don’t want to stop here. Not just yet. Because this is the time when I start to become complacent again. Run in autopilot. And the bad hats and apples start seeping in. A cyclical motion I do not want.

This entry is to remind me of that.

I hope I can prove Mama right this time, and hope she’s proud of what I’ve done so far.

So… how do you keep yourself motivated?